Forget it…I am out of funny holiday lead-ins. Here is a whole heap of hot holiday Santas!
Sometimes quantity doesn’t mean giving up quality.
For those who prefer boxers over briefs…
Well, I suppose Santa’s been nice this year too. *wink*
Today I would like to welcome Lillian Grant to my blog! She is here to talk about her first time– writing erotic romance. (Such dirty minds around here!)
My First Time
When I first joined erotic writers critique group ERA I didn’t write erotica. Now don’t get me wrong, my heroes and heroines were far from chaste, but I didn’t get into the in and outs of the consummation of their union. When I was looking for a home for Happy Birthday, Nancy Tobin, I submitted it to a few publishers but only one showed any interest, Loose Id. They liked the story but before they would give me a contract they said they wanted me to submit a rewritten sex scene. I do believe my editor got her point across by mentioning the words hot and sex more times in one letter than I will ever see again.
Other than the stories I critiqued on ERAuthors, I had never read erotica but I thought, how hard can it be? Silly, silly me! Not only do you have to work out who does what to whom and when, you need to describe it in such a way that you don’t sound like a director of a cheap porn movie. It’s easy to write sex but to make it sensual is another thing altogether.
My first attempts sounded like a commentary not unlike those you hear on National Geographic documentaries about mating zebras. Not sexy at all. Having made sure that in my scene my stars only had two hands, two legs and one of the important bits each, I needed to work out what they could do without sounding like contortionists. Imagine if a reader tried to act it out and damaged themselves? The other problem was how do you describe the most interesting body parts without reusing the same few words over and over again. Thank God for the erotic thesaurus. Who knew there were so many words for the male organ, some of them so funny I was completely distracted from writing. However at last I had the ins and outs written using the most eloquent descriptions. But, alas, my work was far from done. I then needed to know how my characters experienced the seduction and then the consummation of their romance. My story was written from the heroine’s point of view so how did she react mentally and physically to my hero’s best efforts? Thankfully dear Nancy was happy to share her innermost thoughts.
Finally, I decided it worked, and to be honest if I smoked I would have been ready for a cigarette. I never would have believed that something that titillates a reader for mere minutes could take hours to write. I have a much greater respect for erotic authors now, it is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. So hats off to those who give up their time to turn seduction and romance into a beautiful sensual experience for millions of readers worldwide.
Happy Birthday Nancy Tobin
Suddenly single on the eve of her fortieth birthday, Nancy Tobin’s not sure turning middle-aged is worth celebrating. She’s stuck in a dead-end job as the boss’s bitch with only her morose Labrador for a companion. What does she have to party about? Maybe if she ignores the whole birthday thing, it will just go away.
Hot, twenty-six-year-old Jake Turner has other ideas. When he bumps into Nancy at the library, he sees a woman in need of a wake-up call. Determined to unleash the beauty hidden beneath the sad façade, he schemes to relight her spark. He wants to give her a birthday to remember but he ends up being the one who can’t forget: a visit to his apartment becomes a weekend in his bed where he discovers an offbeat, unpredictable, sexually adventurous woman he never wants to let go.
With Jake, Nancy can do anything, her life can be whatever she chooses. But this new and exciting relationship teeters on the edge of destruction when her soon-to-be ex-husband reveals the reason for Jake’s initial interest in her. Can Nancy trust Jake when he finally tells her he loves her?
Nancy walked toward the library. What bright spark thought it was a good idea to build a university campus on the side of a hill and park the library right at the top? Thank God she was finally fit enough to climb the stairs without having to stop to catch her breath halfway up.
When she arrived at her destination, her first port of call was the kitchen for a cup of coffee. Sipping the warm liquid, feeling the caffeine invade her senses, she wondered what excitement the day held. No doubt it would begin with putting last night’s returns on the shelf. Then she’d be at Cynthia’s beck and call. She grimaced. They should just change her job title from library assistant to Cynthia’s bitch. She chuckled. Maybe she would suggest it at her next staff review.
Footsteps approached. She poured the last of her coffee into the sink, put her cup in the dishwasher, and escaped. Small talk was horrendous at the best of times; in the mornings, it was completely unbearable. No one gave a crap about the latest episode of Big Brother or what the weather was supposed to do all week. Why waste your breath on such trivial bullshit?
Nancy heard giggling as she pushed her second full cart around the corner into the row she needed. She came to a halt and stared with disgust at the aisle’s occupants. The library on a Friday morning!
“Excuse me; would you like to take this somewhere else?”
The couple pulled apart, and Nancy glared at them. The boy slowly removed his hand from inside his companion’s shirt and zipped up his pants. They didn’t even have the decency to be embarrassed about being caught.
The blonde piece stuck her nose in the air and barged past Nancy. Her liberally pierced male companion smirked as she dragged him along behind her. No doubt they would find some other equally inappropriate place to copulate.
Not willing to go quietly, the young girl sneered at Nancy and turned to her partner in crime. “Miserable, dried-up old bag. I bet she’s never had a man in her pants.”
Nancy shook her head. The stories she could tell would turn their hair gray, although she’d never considered screwing anyone at the library, not even in her wildest dreams. Why did youngsters assume middle-aged people had never had a life? Dear God, did that mean her parents had been like rabbits, with nothing but sex on their minds? She closed her eyes and shuddered with disgust as she deliberately pushed the thought aside and turned to racy memories of her own youth.
She’d been a typical teenage girl, her bedroom wall covered with posters of virile young men and her head full of love and sex. However, her first sexual encounter had been far from typical. Underage, she had sneaked into a club with her friend Fiona to see a local band, Freddie and the Slayers. Fiona had been madly in love with the lead guitarist, even though he had only had eyes for Nancy. A gorgeous sex god, resplendent in tight black leather pants and a loose white shirt open to the waist. His light brown hair had fallen halfway down his back in a mass of soft curls, and when he’d stared at her, his cobalt blue eyes had given the impression he could read her mind. He’d been a showman with a reputation for being a hard-drinking, hard-living whore who picked up women and discarded them wherever he went.
It seemed his reputation was well earned. Nancy still remembered the pain of losing her virginity and the humiliation when the back doors of the panel van had been flung open and the rest of the band — and Fiona — had stood staring at them. That was the last time she had ever seen Fiona.
The boys had chuckled and made some comment about the “shagging wagon” as the guitarist climbed off her, cock still semierect. At his request, she had written her number on the back of his hand, but she’d never expected Christopher to call. On reflection, it might have been better if he never had
Lost in her memories, Nancy jumped when a hand squeezed her shoulder.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I spoke to you twice.”
Nancy turned around. Stunned, she stared at the gorgeous specimen who had interrupted her. Had he sought her out after their impromptu skirmish in the corridor the day before? She mentally shook herself. Get a grip. Of course not. Look at him. He was only about twenty-five, if that. Yesterday she’d only seen those big smoky brown eyes ringed by long dark lashes. They gave the impression he wore eyeliner. She looked closer. Now she could see the gorgeous eyes were complemented by a square jaw, high cheekbones, and short dark hair.
She became aware she was staring at him and the fact that he was still waiting for a reply. She smiled.
“Not your fault. I was miles away. What can I do for you?”
“Were they pleasant?”
“Were what pleasant?”
Nancy shrugged. “Not really, just memories from another life. So what can I help you with?”
“The lady at the desk told me to try looking over here for a copy of the Kama Sutra, but I can’t find it. Any ideas?”
Nancy stared at him, opening and closing her mouth a couple of times. The students game enough to check out that tome usually hid it in a pile of textbooks. They certainly didn’t accost her in the aisles and ask for help finding it. “Why would you want the Kama Sutra? What the hell are you studying?”
The young man folded his arms and chuckled. “Don’t tell me you’re a prude. Surely someone as pretty as you is a woman of the world?”
Okay, so he majored in bullshit. The reflection in this morning’s mirror pulled no punches, and pretty was stepping way beyond reality.
“Flattery will get you nowhere, young man.”
He smiled at her, his eyes seeming to twinkle with amusement. It appeared she’d become his latest plaything. The batteries in his Game Boy must have gone flat.
“My name’s Jake, Jake Turner.”
Well, Mr. Smoky Eyes had a name. It suited him. Not that she needed to know his moniker. They were ships in the night. No doubt he had some blonde bimbo tucked away somewhere, ready to scratch his itch. Nancy could see the wall clock over his shoulder. Time was marching on. Cynthia would be doing her rounds soon. Woe betide anyone caught shirking.
“Well, Jake, if we have a copy, it will be in the next aisle.”
“Thank you.” His lopsided grin made her heart beat faster. “Lovely to bump into you again.”
Despite her best intentions, her face broke into a smile. “You’re most welcome. Now move along.”
He leaned his shoulder against the shelf. “Not until you tell me your name.”
The familiar stomp of Cynthia’s size 10 shoes approached, but he still didn’t move.
“Nancy. Now get out of here before I get in trouble.” She waved her hands to shoo him along.
“Okay, Nancy. Thank you for your help.”
She watched him wander away. When he slid his hands into his front pockets, pulling his jeans tight, she couldn’t help but notice his firm backside. At the end of the aisle, he glanced over his shoulder and winked at her.
“Maybe I’ll bump into you again.”
Caught with her gaze drilling his backside, Nancy felt her face flush and turned the other way as she fumbled and dropped a book on the floor with a loud thud. She bent down and scooped it up just as Cynthia arrived in the aisle and glared at her.
“Nancy, get a move on. You’re not paid to socialize with the students. If that book’s damaged, the cost will be coming out of your wages.”
With great difficulty, Nancy fought the urge to flip her the bird, afraid Cynthia would look back around the corner and catch her. Alone again, she glanced down the now empty corridor toward where Jake had disappeared. What did he mean about maybe bumping into her again? Her heart skipped a beat at the thought that he might come back.
* * * * *
Nancy sat alone at the table near the student café. Despite her best intentions not to, she searched the male population for Jake. He must have been teasing. Why would a cute young guy be interested in her? She stared at the nubile female bodies as they walked past, their belly buttons proudly displaying all manner of trinkets and tattoos and yelling to the world, I’m young, supple, and the best shag you could ever have. She looked down at herself and saw the roll of flab above her waistband. Her body appeared to yell, I’m old and saggy and too fucking tired to care if I ever shag again. Why would he even give her a second thought? Perhaps it was a dare or a joke.
“Excuse me; is this seat taken?”
The voice dragged Nancy back to reality, and she looked up, surprised to see a familiar face. Her cheeks burned, and she struggled to speak.
“No, please, feel free.”
Jake slid into the seat next to her. “So, Nancy, we meet again. Are you stalking me by any chance?”
Nancy was quick to shake her head. While she had been hoping to see him again, she had no intention of revealing that to anyone. She could barely believe it herself. Was she so desperate for love she would latch on to the first male who showed a glimmer of interest? No matter why she attracted him, with her track record, she should avoid good-looking young men like the plague. “No, absolutely not. Are you sure you’re not stalking me? I was here first.”
His deep, sexy chuckle resonated through her. “Touché. You guessed it. Someone is paying me to follow you.”
“Well, they’re wasting their money, I can assure you. There is nothing to see here.”
“Let me be the judge of that. Did you miss me?”
Nancy tore her eyes away from his and tried to sound nonchalant. “I haven’t given you a moment’s thought since you left the library.”
He put his hand over hers, and she felt the blood rush to her cheeks again. When he leaned closer, she closed her eyes. The smell of his musky cologne and the feel of his breath on her face as he whispered in her ear made her stomach lurch and her heart rate lift.
“Liar, but it’s okay. I’ve been thinking about you too.”
Nancy opened her eyes and snapped her head around to glare at him. No one in their right mind would think about her. She refused to be the butt of anyone’s joke. Her hand hovered in midair as she fought the urge to slap his face. Jake leaned back and put his arm up. Deciding he wasn’t worth it, Nancy dropped her hand and snatched her empty Coke bottle off the table instead.
She clenched her teeth. “Fuck off, you git; you’re not funny,” she spat out.
Without another word, she got up and stomped back to the library, tears of frustration stinging her eyes. Stupid, stupid woman
Did you like what you read? Get a copy here: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Ddigital-text&field-keywords=happy+birthday%2C+nancy+tobin&x=0&y=0
My website is www.lilliangrant.com
Got any questions for Lillian or leave a comment about a birthday surprise (good or bad). Thanks again for stopping by Lillian, and I wish you much success with your book!
ETA: It’s Christmas! I want to give a gift…so one lucky commenter (be sure to leave a way for me to contact you) will get a copy of Happy Birthday Nancy Tobin (this is an ebook)! If you Tweet about the contest and post a link to the tweet in the comments I will give you one extra entry! Merry Christmas! Contest ends Monday December 20th 8pm PT. I will pick a winner soon after.
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells… What?*Grins*
If only that is really what came out of Santa’s bag!
Gosh, Santa looks exhausted. He could use some TLC. *waggles eyebrows*
Fa-la-la-la la la la! Deck the halls with boughs of… *cough*Okay, okay. Here are this weeks Holiday Hotties…Santa never looked so sexy! *fans self*
Yeah. I was a naughty girl. Yes I was.
Okay. I was BAD. I was very, very BAD.
Or I could be.
Today I would like to welcome Paige Tyler to the blog! I am very excited as she is my very first guest blogger and author here! So I hope everyone makes her feel welcome and of course checks out her new release later this week.
Readers often ask me how I come up with ideas for my books, so I thought I’d give you a little behind-the-scenes peek at how I came up with my new release, a paranormal erotic romance from Ellora’s Cave called DEAD SEXY.
Before I say anything else though, isn’t that cover too hot for words?! When the art department sent it to me, I probably gazed at it for a good ten minutes in mouth-drooling appreciation before I could email them back telling the artist it not only rocked, but totally fit the book. The hero is ”Dead Sexy,” after all!
Okay, back to the story and how I came up with it. First, to set the stage, I need to share a little something with you about myself. Well, about my hubby and me, actually. We love zombie movies, from the George Romero gems to Shaun of the Dead and everything in between, including “Walking Dead,” the new series on AMC. You just can’t go wrong with a movie full of walking dead people, can you? Well, if you’ve ever seen a zombie movie (or even you haven’t), then you know the creatures aren’t the heroes of the film. I mean, how can they be, right? They’re all dead and decayed and downright unattractive, not to mention pretty damn scary. Which was why you can imagine my surprise when my hubby suggested I write an erotic romance about a zombie hero. I was like, you’re kidding, right? What woman in her right mind would fall in love with a dead guy? No way could that possibly work, or so I thought.
Turns out, my hubby wasn’t kidding. In fact, he started working up ideas for the story.
“The hero didn’t have to be a zombie all the time,” he told me. ”Think outside the box – take a little literary license!”
Okay, I thought. I suppose I could be open minded.
My hubby told me that in his out-of-the-box world, the hunky hero got cursed by an evil Voodoo priestess and only turns into a zombie sometimes.
“I’m listening,” I said.
“And when he does go zombie, he doesn’t have to be like the kind in the movies,” my hubby added. “Well, he has to look like one, you know all dead and stuff, but he doesn’t have to be a mindless creature or attack humans or eat anything gross.”
So, brains are completely out, thanks goodness!
“Think Jensen Ackles or Jared Padelecki, with a really, really, really dark tan - (yes, my hubby knows I’ve got a thing for the Supernatural hunks!) - well, maybe more gray and black than tan, but you get the idea.”
I thought about that for a minute. “So, the hero’s dead, but he’s still sexy, is that what you’re saying?”
“Exactly,” he said, giving me a grin as my eyes lit up with understanding.
By that point, my hubby had pretty much sold me on the idea. Of course, I knew if I ran with it, I was going to have to sell it to a publisher, and I knew that could be tough since the hero is a zombie. But I ran with it anyway and ended up with a full-length novel. And it came out pretty damn good, if I do say so myself! I still had to find a publisher for it, though.
About this same time, It just so happens that several of my other books were in the process of being picked up by Ellora’s Cave and I thought what the heck? Why not pitch it to my editor there and see what she thinks? So I did, and she told me to send it to her. She was interested to see how I handled the whole zombie-thing. Well, long story, short, she liked it. A lot! My zombie romance with it’s dead-sexy hero had a home! I was thrilled and my hubby walked around for a week with a smug, “I-told-you-so” look on his face.
I’ve been getting the word out there about DEAD SEXY ever since I signed the contract for it and I’m thrilled with the interest from readers who can’t wait to get their hands on it! I can’t wait for them to read it, too!
Now that I’ve revealed the story behind the story, I thought I’d share the blurb and an excerpt just to whet your appetite for more!
Romance author Simone Kent thinks she might just have found the most perfect guy in all of New York City – in bed and out. But Drake Parrish is about as far from perfect as any man can get. Eight years ago, he was cursed by an evil Voodoo priestess to live part of his life as a zombie. Since then, he has lived like a recluse on New York’s Upper East Side, afraid to go out for fear he’ll suddenly turn into one of the walking dead.
The sex if the hottest either of them has ever experienced and Simone discovers just how naughty she can be with Drake, while he finds himself feeling things for her that he hasn’t felt in a very long time. When the Voodoo priestess learns of their relationship, however, she comes after him again. She is determined to make sure he won’t have a future with Simone, even if that means killing both him and the woman he loves.
As she led him up the steps to the second floor, Drake found himself wondering if she would ask him in. And wondering what he’d say if she did. When they came to a stop outside the door to her apartment, Simone turned to give him a smile.
“I had a great time tonight.”
She caught her bottom lip between her perfect white teeth and chewed on it thoughtfully as if unsure what she wanted to say next. It was probably an unconscious gesture, something she did whenever she was thinking, but to him, it was sexy as hell and all he could think about was kissing her.
Surely, one kiss couldn’t hurt. He desperately wanted to. He hadn’t kissed a woman in so long. It would be nice to see if he still remembered how.
Before he could stop himself, Drake tilted Simone’s face up to his and pressed his mouth to hers.
She tasted just as sweet and delicious as he thought she would. Her lips were soft and pliant under his as she kissed him back, her tongue eagerly seeking his out.
Drake groaned and slid his hand into her hair, deepening the kiss. Simone sighed into his mouth, running her hands up the front of his shirt to grasp his shoulders. The feel of her touch was like a tonic to his deprived soul and he let out another groan, deeper this time.
He ran his free hand up her side and around to her breast, cupping it through the soft material of her dress. He couldn’t stop himself and apparently, Simone didn’t want him to. She moaned and arched against him. He could feel the heat of her pussy through their clothes as she pressed up against his hard cock. Damn, she felt good.
Drake drew her bottom lip into his mouth and gently suckled on it before slowly kissing his way along the delicate curve of her jaw. Simone clutched his shoulders and tilted her head back. He eagerly trailed a path of hot kisses down her neck, then back up, his mouth finding hers again. Simone looped her arms around his neck, pulling him in even closer as their tongues met.
Down the hall, a door slammed, reminding him where they were.
Drake dragged his mouth away from hers, his breathing ragged as he tried to regain control. He had to get it together because he was about five seconds away from doing something really stupid. Like taking her to bed. “I should go.”
Her lips curved into a sexy, flirtatious smile. “Or you could stay.”
God, how he wanted to. But as much as he’d love to spend the rest of the night exploring every inch of her body, he couldn’t take the chance he might go zombie on her right in the middle of sex. Talk about coitus interruptus, And it had already been almost four days since he last turned, which meant he was already pushing his luck.
“You don’t know how much I want to,” he groaned. “But I can’t.”
Simone looked up at him with those big, blue eyes. “Why not?”
“Because I…” He hesitated, trying to come up with something that would sound believable. “I have a column due in the morning and I haven’t even started on it yet.” She knew all about deadlines, so she would understand that. Besides, he did have a column to write, it just wasn’t due until next week. “Rain check?”
She looked disappointed, but she smiled anyway. “Absolutely. How does coming over for dinner tomorrow night sound?”
It would be crazy to agree when he could be so close to having an episode, but he couldn’t say no. Not when she asked in that soft, sultry voice. “Sounds great.”
“Good. Be here at seven.”
“Seven it is.”
She pulled him down for another long, slow kiss on the mouth. “Don’t be late.”
His mouth twitched. “I won’t.” He bent his head to kiss her again, then groaned. “If I don’t go now, I’ll be here all night.”
Simone laughed. “Would that be such a bad thing?”
“Not to me, but my editor at Money Issues might not be too understanding when he doesn’t find my column sitting in his inbox tomorrow.”
She sighed. “Deadlines can be a real pain in the butt sometimes. Okay, go home and write your column. I’ll cuddle up with a bowl of ice cream instead.”
He chuckled. “Sounds better than taking a cold shower, which is what I’m going to be doing when I get home.” He closed his mouth over hers once more. “See you tomorrow night, beautiful.”
Resisting the urge to pull her into his arms again, Drake turned and walked down the hallway toward the stairwell. At the top of the steps, he glanced over his shoulder to see Simone standing where he’d left her, a sexy curve to her lips.
It took every ounce of strength he possessed not to go back and pin her against the door for one more long, lingering kiss. God, what he wouldn’t give to spend the night with her. Man, it was going to take more than a cold shower to get her out of his head.
Hope you enjoyed the excerpt and that you can’t wait to read more! You can get DEAD SEXY from Ellora’s Cave at http://www.jasminejade.com/ps-8917-50-dead-sexy.aspx
You can also check out the trailer here!
If you decide to pick up DEAD SEXY, let me know how you like it!
Wow! That was hot. Thank you Paige for stopping by and sharing your sexy zombie with us. Who knew the undead could be so sultry.
For more info on Paige and her books please check out her website and her blog at the links below.
Bonus: Paige has a Christmas themed free read up at Ellora’s Cave – Caught Red Handed
Welcome to the first of the Holiday Hotties of the Week! Ho! Ho! Ho!
Ho! Ho! Ho!
Um. Can I hold that for you? Yeah. Your sack. The one in your hand.
Yes Santa, I’d like to sit on your lap…